Who's Losing It?

Partner noted last night that I'm losing it: it started with having cereal for dinner last Saturday, and it was continuing last night when I indicated that perhaps we could leave the A/C on. All night. But does this really constitute losing it? You be the judge.

I detest the air conditioning. I hate it. First of all, it's summer. The windows should just be open and we should be hot. Why should we be hot? Because it's summer. Simple enough logic. Before you know it, it's going to be winter again and we'll be wearing our woolies and the windows will be shut up tight and the only sound we'll hear for six months is the whoosh of the furnace going on and off. Contrast this with the summer where we get to hear birds, and the sounds of cars driving down the road, and the breeze through the window, and in some neighborhoods maybe even kids on bikes, or people walking down the street. It's lovely really. And it's also true that I may just have a little bit of snake in me: I could just be on a rock and soak up the sun.

And here's the other thing about the a/c: I don't want to be cold in my house in the summer. Seriously-- It's Michigan. We don't get to be hot that much. I want to step out of the shower and get to feel warm. I actually like the way the humid air feels-- like it's enveloping me. I like the way my skin gets nice and moist, not scaly and dry like it does in the winter. ***

We turned on the air Sunday when we were fleeing the house to go to my parents pool. It felt mean to the cats not to do so. I mean, it has been in the upper 90s! But we turned off the air immediately upon returning home. A big box fan in the window and an oscillating fan did the trick. Believe it or not, I woke up cold in the night and turned the fan down. Then yesterday, we knew we'd be gone again all day, so the air went back on for the kitties. We came back home around 8:30 pm, and left the air on while we ate, just as a treat mostly for Partner. By the time we were going to bed, I decided I had enough. We turned off the air, put the fans in the windows and got into bed.

Immediately the wind whipped up-- It was scary, people. Scary. We jumped out of bed, sure that a tornado must be rolling in, and the thing is, we're just far enough out of reach from the sirens. We'd never know. Partner admitted maybe we should go downstairs. I was sure one of our trees was ready to blow down. Partner stood outside just to torment me. Sirens went wailing down the road next to our house. I hate to admit how nervous it made me. We sat down there for a bit watching the totally inane local news (Local boy has lyme disease!) and finally things calmed down enough to return upstairs.

However, on our way up I suggested to Partner that perhaps we could just keep the air on all night. The windows shut. The blinds, where we have them, pulled down. That's when she suggested I was losing it. It was midnight, so I might have agreed.

For some reason, Partner went back downstairs, and she was there for awhile, with the lights off. It was a little weird, so I called out to her, asking what she was doing down there? "I'm watching this deer," she called back. "It's really weird and not moving or anything. I can't quite make out it's features." This isn't so odd-- we'll see deer in the backyard at night, and mostly they look like big shadows, not really distinct in any way. Eventually she made it back to bed.

This morning I woke up and looked out into our backyard. Some of the deck furniture is tossed about, the hammock is overturned, and there in the middle of the yard is our rain barrel, so I pointed it out to Partner. She looked at it with some interest, and then said, "That's the deer I must have been looking at last night. I guess that explains why it wasn't moving. And I couldn't figure out why it was so low to the ground. I thought maybe it was a coyote, but I didn't want to scare you.... Huh..."

And so I ask you, who's losing it? The cereal eater and a/c giver-inner? Or the seer of deer in giant green barrels? I don't know, but to me, the answer seems fairly obvious.




***I reserve the right to note that I am making these a/c comments regarding life in Michigan. If you live somewhere where the climate is, let's say, more consistently warm than here, these notes on the a/c need not apply. For example, when we are in South Carolina in August, you will not hear me complain once about the a/c. And of course, I understand that even in Michigan, there are cut-off temperatures where everyone is going to want the a/c. And of course the work place need not apply to my vitriol about a/c either. But unless it's in the 90s, I don't really get it. For example, I don't think our neighbors, lovely people they are, ever open their windows. It's freaking depressing to me. Open the damn windows! It's summer, people! Breathe in some real air!!