This Was Yesterday

A baby vodka martini on the side porch in the sun with a book. Home alone. Then another drink with Partner to watch the Derby, which was great while it lasted even though not one of my picks was win, place, or show. The garage was clean. We were happy and light. (Yes, that's pickled spicy okra in my drink, and if you haven't tried it, you should.) There was bbq for dinner. And stored up shows on the TiVo for later.

Today, even though it's beautiful outside, we are not as happy and light. We started that way on our trek to the church of reproductivity. The doctor was pleasant and hopeful. He said we'll trigger Partner tonight and retrieve, possibly, six to seven eggs on Tuesday.

And then we went out for breakfast where we probably talked about the "business" too much for a Sunday morning in springtime.

And then we went to Costco, and things derailed. I coudn't buy geraniums for the porch because we "don't have money" to do that. And then I felt a hot flash of annoyance. And then Partner disappeared, only to reappear pushing a $47.00 "moving kit" with boxes and markers and sundry items. It will be helpful. Wheares my geraniums won't be, I know, but still... Since we have lived together I have gotten geranium pots every summer. The smell reminds me of my grandmother who also kept geraniums all around her house. And then I tried not to cry. And then I did cry in the car. And then I told myself to cop on, because really we're all healthy and walking around, which is more than some of my friends are doing right now. So I stopped crying and looked up into the blue sky. We're still quiet here. I think tired. Sick of shots. Needing a drink later on this evening, but realizing I drank the rest of the vodka with my mini-martini yesterday and there's no sweet vermouth for a manhattan and I'm too lazy to stop at the store for either.

I'm not good with change, like moving. And the painters are coming, which is an indeliable sign that soon enough the house will go on to the multi-listing. (Right now it's just an "exclusive" listing with one agency.) And people are going to troop through the house.

But hopefully this feeling I have will pass away quickly because it really actually is exciting that we're triggering Partner tonight and next week at this time, I'll be flopping around on my bedrest. Life is good-- It's okay even though I can't have my geraniums.